Diary of a Bad, Bad Bookkeeper (Day 14) – The Carnage Begins

Well Diary,

Betty Bookkeeper HeadshotToday was the day… the FIRST day that I stole from the company.  Today, I forged my first check with the owner’s signature. I would have done it a couple days ago – as soon as I found out the owner doesn’t open the bank statements, and in fact expects me to do it – but the owner suddenly changed his pattern. Instead of staying out of the office, like he had done every day of the first nine days, he decided to stay in the office to “take care of some things.” Since I wasn’t expecting it, I decided to wait to see what it was he needed to take care of. Luckily, it wasn’t anything that had to do with me or the books.

Well, even if it did have to do with the books, he wouldn’t have found anything. I’m doing a very good job right now. After all, I have to prove my worth somehow.

I wrote the check for $100. I know, it’s not much, but it’s a start. Just something to see if he notices that I stole it. I’m sure he won’t notice since I took the check out of sequence. But if he does, I can say it’s for the Petty Cash Box that he doesn’t have. If he doesn’t notice… well then, I’m going to suggest he GET a Petty Cash Box. After all… “it makes MY job so much easier if we can have cash around for emergencies.” (If this was a video, then right now is where I would do the evil laugh…)

And there’s no worries about the bank clearing it.  Banks don’t have enough time to check every signature.


To Stop The Carnage Caused by Forgery:

Unfortunately, when superhero_edited_no_maska bookkeeper forges a check, the only way a Small Business Owner is going to know is if they open the bank statements first.  And…the general rule is: He who opens the bank statement is the one who can hide or destroy the checks. So if an SBO opens the bank statement, they will get a chance to find the forged check before it can mysteriously disappear.

When yo do open the bank statement, check that all signatures are your signatures.  Take a second look at anything that was signed by a signature stamp or a doesn’t look like your signature.  Also, look for check numbers that are obviously way out of sequence or missing a check number because there’s a good possibility that it’s a forged check.

If your bookkeeper did cash a forged check, contact your bank and inform them that the check was forged.  Sometimes, they will be able to pull the funds from whatever bank account they were deposited in and put those funds back in your account.  But – more than likely – once the check has cleared, you can’t get the money back.  So be vigilant in opening the bank statement BEFORE your bookkeeper does.

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Originally posted 2010-03-14 08:00:06. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

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6 Responses to Diary of a Bad, Bad Bookkeeper (Day 14) – The Carnage Begins

  1. This was a really quite excellent post. In theory I’d wish to publish like this also – getting time and actual effort to make a good piece of writing… but what can I say… I procrastinate alot and by no means seem to obtain some thing done.

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  5. Elizabeth says:

    Here in Australia, the cheques (checks) don’t come back with the bank statement. – they stay with the bank. It would be even easier for Betty to do her embezellment here. If a business has hundreds of lines on a bank statement, it’s doubtful that the business owner would spot $100 here and there even if they were opening & reading the statements. It’s scary how easy it is for someone not so trustworthy.

    Great blog!

  6. Love your stories. They are not far off the mark at all. I was the Executive Director of the Institute of Professional Bookkeepers of Canada for almsot 5 years and have seen and heard this in real life. As a result, I started a new company, http://www.ihonest.com to help honest bookkeepers attract high quality clients. Thank you so much for your contribution to an honest industry.